Talkin wit my Dad always makes me feel better. I needed that. I tried laying down, and I didn't want anotr sleepless night like last night. I felt long to othr and my Dad always takes that away. Jus even wen he tells me about his day. We don't ven hav to cover my issues. Sometimes I think it best not to. I hate appearing so weak and confused. Like my mom though he sees it. More so than her.
Well we had a cull laughs and he to me about a few things he has ben doin to make progress with a few projects he has goin. Beautiful.
Ok I walked through Sams club and I memories began to flood. My ex or my late rather. I missed him so my knees felt weak. Yes I think of him all the time I have reminders all around me. Although the thoughts come and go quickly without having me go through any emotional states. That hit me all of a sudden.
I miss his smell, and the way we discussed things. He would nevr argue wit me eithr. He wud remain silent and jus giv me a certain look or avoid troublesome convo. Lmao.
Welp, he's gone and there is nothing I can do about that.
I want him wen I feel like I had anothr blooper male moment. I did say though I doubt I even let their Dad move in. I dont want anothr failed attempt having my kids used to seein a man evyday again. Something I gotta scratch the scalp on really.
My Dad and I talked about evything almost, and you kno all yalls granma used to te you, you gots to rid the old and unworthy to hav room for the new and worth while. I second that. Whole heartedly.
Laughing at what my Dad sed about ol boy that gone missing too. He read my blogs of course, and he sed that man has a lifestyle of always staying from place to place cuz he nevr invest nowhere. He laughed cuz I tol him he looked all stressed out wen he came to get his clothes off my porch. Dad sed well he was and if he hada invested u cudnt had out him out.
That's crazy too. There are all types of men somold and still not living like they are that as the minutes pass ur time is passing as well.
Trust that can b argued by some, which I wud definitely agree. The whole time is not real it's all psychological thing. Agree. To must though we are what we think so therefore as we live we die.
Goodnight. I guess I have anothr outlet as well. The dumb thn bs that I do can hopefully b viewed so you don't lol. Advise is always better given than taken