Well it's amazing how time changes things. It really does. Time is this element made real by man in the mind. It's all pschogical yet it has such an impact on us.
It's really sad however on the flip when time doesn't change things. For the good I guess. I say this all the time..... 'in life every choice you have is yours. Every decision u make comes with consequence as well though. Rather good or bad consequence that belongs to u. Lol
Ok well my husband came home finally. After all these years. His first week was beautiful. He got the feel for waking with his babies, and he enjoyed me to an extent. I hate lying and wondering when dark secrets will come out. So being sloppy and careless as usual I lefty I gs out to b found. He has been making me pay for it ever since.
Now that I am 6 months pregnant and out of wrk he has been acting better. Guess cuz I used to toss the notion that I don't need anyone.
He asked me to have a baby, sed that would make things better for our marriage. We be stopped yelling and screaming and trying to choke me out every weekend lol. That was crazy. I would try to run. He would drink on Friday and start going crazy on me the whole weekend.
Well blah blah blah all that I'll have to get to it flash backs I guess.
Back to now. He waits till I get pregnant he's sooooo happy all of a sudden then he jus goes off and Waits till I am 3-4 months and says he doesn't wanna wrk it out and I've done too much. What kinda shit is that. Smh. I explained to him it's not me and the things I've done while he was locked up, it's him jus not wanting to do what he wants do to do when and how he wants too. Same thing he sed and did when I was pregnant with the twins. I got pregnant he thought noone wanted me and he was a mess. Horrible mess. Told me we got marrie too young and he wants to b with as many women as he wants to. Oh well.
Now I have my son finally. Can't wait to name him. Can't wait to c him and get to know him. I feel him moving and it gives me strength to know that I am going to b ok.
With or without him.
Well I have heads to do and have to start focusing on this growing boys future already. I have been so distracted. Trying to prove something I shud not have to prove at all. I am good woman and beautiful and strong. My children prove that. They r brilliant and spiked and annoying lmao.
Hit on the blog tomarrow.
NJoy
It's really sad however on the flip when time doesn't change things. For the good I guess. I say this all the time..... 'in life every choice you have is yours. Every decision u make comes with consequence as well though. Rather good or bad consequence that belongs to u. Lol
Ok well my husband came home finally. After all these years. His first week was beautiful. He got the feel for waking with his babies, and he enjoyed me to an extent. I hate lying and wondering when dark secrets will come out. So being sloppy and careless as usual I lefty I gs out to b found. He has been making me pay for it ever since.
Now that I am 6 months pregnant and out of wrk he has been acting better. Guess cuz I used to toss the notion that I don't need anyone.
He asked me to have a baby, sed that would make things better for our marriage. We be stopped yelling and screaming and trying to choke me out every weekend lol. That was crazy. I would try to run. He would drink on Friday and start going crazy on me the whole weekend.
Well blah blah blah all that I'll have to get to it flash backs I guess.
Back to now. He waits till I get pregnant he's sooooo happy all of a sudden then he jus goes off and Waits till I am 3-4 months and says he doesn't wanna wrk it out and I've done too much. What kinda shit is that. Smh. I explained to him it's not me and the things I've done while he was locked up, it's him jus not wanting to do what he wants do to do when and how he wants too. Same thing he sed and did when I was pregnant with the twins. I got pregnant he thought noone wanted me and he was a mess. Horrible mess. Told me we got marrie too young and he wants to b with as many women as he wants to. Oh well.
Now I have my son finally. Can't wait to name him. Can't wait to c him and get to know him. I feel him moving and it gives me strength to know that I am going to b ok.
With or without him.
Well I have heads to do and have to start focusing on this growing boys future already. I have been so distracted. Trying to prove something I shud not have to prove at all. I am good woman and beautiful and strong. My children prove that. They r brilliant and spiked and annoying lmao.
Hit on the blog tomarrow.
NJoy
