I was in shocked when I opened my eyes again. Realizing my head was really inside of the same wall that he had bust open about 2 weeks prior to hide his dope and money from his junkie mother, "WHAT THE FUCK" was all I could say. Once I finally gained the strength to get my head out of the wall I looked directly into his eyes and all he could say was "I keep telling you to stop trying to play me.".
I couldnt believe he said that shit to me. All I could do was just walk away. Nothing to say, nothing to do. There was nothing left in me. As I walked down the stairs all I could think was I'm done. I'm finally fucking done. I couldn't take it anymore. The physical,mental ,and emotional abuse was killing me. He "the love of my life"was killing me. I walked out the door, got into my car, and I never looked back. I drove home crying and confused about rather this was actually my fault. Had there been signs all along?
When I got home my aunt was there with my father. She was all up in my face asking me what was wrong with both my eyes. I told her it was my allergies and simply walked away. locking myself in my room, all I could do is cry. I cried myself to sleep. When I woke up I realized he had called my phone over and over,nonstop for the last 2.5 hours. I got up and fixed me a plate of food. I went directly back to my bedroom and sat across my bed. All I could think of was "BIG" that was what everyone called him, (though I beg to differ). I sat and ate my food as he began to ring my phone again. I just stared at the name across the phone. I will admit I was scared to answer. What should I do?
The phone stop ringing and the voicemail indicator flashed, I pressed the talk button to listen to the new message, I dialed the number to retrieve the message and I could hear a voice on the other line yelling "hello?" "YO?".I spoke into the receiver ,"hello?"I have to admit the first sound of his voice made my honycomb hide out begin to moisten.He sternly spoke,"what you mad at me now?" why you wasn't answering your phone"?"Man I aint got time for this bullshit,you aint leaving me ,if thats what you thinking!"The phone went silent.How could I respond?What the hell am i gonna say?Then the nigga nonchalantly says"What you doing?Before I knew it i was answering his ass,telling him that I had just woke up and ate some food left for me from dinner.We talked about all the fun things we had done together and all the shopping sprees,and how he had even fronted the money to pay the mortgage on my ailing father's home in which my father and I lived.Basically he said enough to make me realize i needed him in my life,he was appreciated I had to admit.That night we fell asleep on the phone with eachother,the next morning I woke up to the sound of my doorbell.....
I will be back to confess.
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